What Qualifies Me?

I was speaking with a gentleman the other day about my coaching business and my various work background experiences. He posed the question “how does your experience as a Brand Ambassador and Spokesmodel qualify you to be a life coach?” To which I replied, “It doesn’t.” True Life Coaching is about the client, not the coach. The coach shows up, holds space, asks powerful questions to direct the client back to themselves. A coach is a powerful sounding board or mirror or “devil’s advocate” in the process of moving toward the “goals” you have. That’s where my genius lies! I have spent my life and work experiences connecting to the heart of people. I am wired as a communicator and encourager. As a talent coach I travel the country listening to the unique passions in the hearts of all those thousands of people who wanted to enter the entertainment industry. Each one having a unique sound and expression to bring forth. All moving toward the same industry but each with their own road to get there and their own desired destination. That’s what I loved. The variety of each person’s heart and journey and gifts and being part of the process of seeing the very best in them come forward and seeing their road unfold before them. It was never about me except that my combination of gifts and experiences with my own heart journey wired me to be that perfect instrument to support them in their pursuit. It was a win-win.

What qualifies anyone for their job, first is their authentic desire or passion for it combined with the design of that person–natural gifts, capabilities and skills necessary to execute it well. The first is wired into your heart! No one coaxes it out of you and it’s not a performance to please someone else or compensate for some internal fear or insecurity. The second is wired into your gift set–brain wired aptitudes, spiritual gifts, talents, communication style, then some of the capabilities and skills are developed over time with use and practice.

I’ve spent my life discovering my unique design and authentic expression and also developing my various skills to be excellent at the things it takes to be a great coach. My various assessments validate it as a great choice for me–everything from my Life Languages, DISC, Strengths FInder, Myers Briggs, Aptitudes, Testimonies of others. Sure, I have certifications in areas I find valuable tools to serve my clients with, but anyone can get a certification and function in a particular role even if it doesn’t fully align with who they are at their core. The truest qualification for this job is that it is an authentic and effortless expression of me to the world, And, also, I love it and am good at it.

The specifics of the coaching focus for each person will vary, but at the core of it all is the goal of you living authentically and fully alive doing what you live and what makes you come alive so you can share it with the world and lead a life you love. I just happen to have a heart and ears that is uniquely tuned to the sound of that authenticity and also the fears and shame and insecurity that hold us back from being and doing the things we love. Some things are just an effortless part of who you are that others sense and respond to.

For me, I can take it all the way back to high school and being at parties with drunk friends, and I was the one they would pour their heart out to. I wasn’t asking for it. I wasn’t bringing it out of them. They instinctively sensed I was a safe place to be real. That has been a hallmark of my life. I took those trates into leadership roles I took on in high school and college as a peer counselor and peer advisor. I remember a boy from high school wrote an incredible letter to me after we graduated about how my simple kindness impacted him. We shared a class together and to me I wasn’t doing anything extraordinary but he felt seen and valued and that impacted him. In college, I was the guy whose room was a safe place for other guys to come when they need to talk or get away from it all and we could talk about what was troubling them. I loved being that space for them. When I graduated college, Life Coaching was actually in its infancy as an industry and my college advisors couldn’t give me any guidance, so I just had to start figuring it out. I enrolled in a graduate program for Executive and Professional Coaching, and was by far the youngest person in the program at 23. There were CEOs, Executive Vice Presidents, Heads of HR departments taking this course and yet my professors told me I made great contributions and was a natural at it. I just kept my webcam turned off so no one could see how young I was. About 6 weeks into the program, I withdrew because it was not cheap, and I knew that no one would pay a 23 year old for life coaching. So, I went to work for a success coach and continued to learn from older men in my life. As I moved through life, I have story after story of people with incredible trauma and hardship in their past expressing to me that they felt safe and loved in my presence. I communicated that expression of love and safety and value to many through the kinds of hugs I gave. A hug with no agenda accept that they know they are loved and valued and safe.

I took those same qualities into my career as a talent scout and coach, into all my friendships, and even in the jobs I’ve had traveling the country representing various national brands nd connecting with people in unscripted moments where they are feeling pain or loss or hardship or stress. I don’t show up with any other agenda accept love and the highest good of the person in front of me. That’s why people have said time and time again, “I don’t know why I’m telling you this,” or “I’ve never told anyone this.” They can intuitively pick up who I am, and they respond to that. And, in each of these different moments, I’ve always observed that what is needed for the life and heart and person in front of me effortlessly flows for them in that moment: Wisdom, counsel, encouragement, guidance. See, when you show up with no agenda except the highest good of the heart and life in front of you, then you are able to simply be the conduit for what they need to show up. God and spirit and love can flow through me in that moment and help bring clarity and whatever that heart and mind and moment call for because it’s not about me or any agenda I have. It’s just about that person.

That’s what you get when you spend time with me. No matter what our particular focus is in our time together and no matter what your goals or desires are for your life, the thing that all of these ways to connect have in common is me. You’re here to connect with me and I’m here to connect with and support you. We can do that in many ways and that’s why I offer so many various services in how we spend time together. They are a collection of services and skills and abilities I’ve developed over the years, so I make them available to you. There are many life coaches out there. Many career coaches out there. Many with a vast amount of experience and expertise in your particular field of interest, perhaps. But, what is unique about me is me. My heart and spirit and presence brought to you and our time together combined with my singular interest in you and bringing my natural gifts, my intuition, my developed skills and abilities and using who and what I am to serve and help you. My agenda is you and your heart being fully alive and engaged in the things that give you joy and life.

That’s my qualification. It’s who I am. My design and my life have all pointed me in this direction for a quarter of a century or more.

There is probably a similar story in your life pointing you in a direction you may not see. I just happened to have developed a high level of self awareness to see the trend and pattern and connection. Also one of the strengths of mine that shows up in my assessments! So, let’s do this! Together! Let’s discover your uniqueness, your heart, your passion, your unfolding story, and let’s get you on track and moving in the direction of the life you were put here to live and a life you truly love!